The Positive Values Assets-Asset 26

The Positive Values Assets

Values are the important internal compasses that guide children to make decisions and set priorities. Children’s thoughts and actions are based on their values~even if these values aren’t fully developed. Parents and other adults can help children identify positive values and make them part of their lives. When children have positive values, they grow into caring adults with set high standards for themselves and the people around them.

In terms of family values that are assets in a child’s life, there are six primary categories: family values caring, family values equality and social justice, family values integrity, family values honesty, family values responsibility, and family values healthy lifestyle.

In today’s article I would like to address the first of these: family values caring. Ideally, all children grow up observing parents and other adults helping people. As children mature, they learn and are encouraged to be helpful to others, to care about others in this way. To be sure this is true for your child or children; here are some ways you can invest in this asset:

One of the most predictable ways children learn values is from their almost complete attunement to what you do or say in your interactions with them and with other people. Modeling is the most powerful teacher of values. This is why it is important that you treat others in caring and loving ways, especially when you are around children.

Also, children who feel that others care about their feelings are more likely to care about others themselves. So, be sensitive to children’s emotions and show them appropriate ways to express their feelings. For many adults this may mean developing your own affective or feeling vocabulary. There are literally thousands and thousands of word that express feeling or emotion, but these must be learned just like any other vocabulary of words.

When children misbehave, use discipline methods that last when a parent isn’t there to enforce the rules. Hitting and spanking hurt…and…they don’t teach positive values. Parents who are proficient at learning and applying logical consequences, redirecting, focusing on the positive or time-outs report that their children learn out of respect to behave in positive way and to use similar more caring ways when they are trying to direct behavior in others. Again, as a responsible parent, you can only invest in this asset in this way by making the effort to develop your own disciplinary skills.

Very important in the establishment of positive caring values is to pay attention to when you child is behaving caring ways towards others and make it a point to acknowledge this and give a pat on the back or a hug to say, “I love it when you treat others kindly!”

Other helpful ways to teach this asset are through the care of pets or even plants, taking children with you when volunteering in the community or encouraging your children to give time or a small part of their allowance to a charity or family in need.

As usual, these are only a few ideas for teaching the value of caring. If you have questions or would like more information about this asset, please call or email me and I would be happy to share more.