Family Values Responsibility-Asset 30

Family Values Responsibility

To invest in this developmental asset for your children and your community, parents and other adults need to be conscious of modeling personal responsibility in all they think, speak and do. Through observing responsible adults, children will learn that actions affect others and grow up accepting and taking responsibility for their decisions and actions.

Certainly, as with other developmental assets, the age of your child will influence which approaches to teaching responsibility you use. One thing that’s important for children, toddlers on up, is how you relate to them. In day-to-day interactions, children learn responsibility from your ability to respond to their needs. Being there for your children and being true to your word go a long way towards their learning the value of responsiveness in relationship to others.

Children can also learn from you talking about and explaining what responsibility means. For instance, you can say to your school age child, “I want to be at the Parent-Teacher Night because I love you and I feel it’s my responsibility as your parent to know how things are going for you at school.”

Another thing you can do is to involve your child in making up your To-Do list for the day. Let them know that you are making a list of things you are responsible for getting done that day and ask if there is anything he or she would like you to do for them. You could say, “I am going to the grocery store and to the shopping mall today. Here are some of the things I plan to get. Is there anything you need that I have missed?”

You can also teach your child to make their own To-Do lists, explaining that it is a great way for them to stay on track with things they want to be sure to do that day. Their list can and should include fun things to do as well as things they are responsible for doing, such as walking the dog, doing the dishes or doing their math homework. This is also a great time to teach your child that many things they may want to get done need to be broken down into smaller more achievable tasks. You can help them decide and put the proper steps to their goals on their list, even if it’s a daily recap and going from where they left off the day before. Learning this type of follow through and persistence is very valuable to learning responsible behavior.

Younger children learn by doing, so encourage, acknowledge and thank them for accomplishing things like brushing their teeth on their own, turning off lights and especially for following through on simple tasks without being told. At the same time, don’t expect perfection right off the bat. Reward attempts as they learn tasks and responsibilities. If your child doesn’t behave responsibly, find out what’s wrong and how they are feeling. They may be tired, hungry, need personal attention or are distracted by something else. Attend to their needs first then ask them to take care of their responsibilities. Again, responsibilities at this age should be simple and relatively easily accomplished.

So there are a few ideas for you. Let me know if you have questions or want to explore how to invest in this asset further. And remember, in our world freedom comes from responsibility!